Calming Stress with Self-Care
Balancing a schedule of university classes, schoolwork, and deadlines can be stressful. It is important to take care of yourself when you are stressed out. Taking a break to rest and recharge can be very helpful. According to the American Psychological Association, self-care is defined as, "activities or behaviors that enhance mental, emotional, and/or physical health and well being." Whether your self-care activity is eating a healthy meal, going for a walk, taking a nap, coloring, painting, listening to music, dancing around your room, or talking to a friend-- self-care is an important tool for taking care of yourself. If you are feeling stressed out, a self-care activity can help you to feel calmer and more centered.
Photo of tea and baked goods by Reyhaneh Mehrnejad on Unsplash. Photo of blooming protea plant at UConn Greenhouse by Renee W. 10,000 Lux seasonal affective disorder lamps at U Toronto Library, photo by Renee W.
Examples of Self-Care Activities:
- Going for a walk outside
- Cooking a meal for yourself
- Taking a nap to rest
- Watching a comedy show to laugh
- Calling a friend to talk
- Writing in a journal to express your feelings
- Taking deep breaths to relax the body
- Smelling a relaxing essential oil like lavender
- Drinking a cup of tea and taking a moment to pause
- Sitting in front of a 10,000 Lux SAD lamp in winter to feel more awake and positive
- Breaking a sweat by exercising to release endorphins
Online Free Wellness Classes:
There are several free wellness classes online which teach students how to live well, and take care of themselves.
- Coursera: Science of Well BeingClass from Laurie Santos of Yale University
- Coursera: Resilience Skills in a Time of UncertaintyClass from UPenn
For more information about the origins and history of the term "self-care," please refer to the link below which provides a nice overview.
- A History of Self-CareSlate article by Aisha Harris.
Grounding Techniques
Other strategies for calming yourself down when stressed or anxious are often called grounding techniques. Some examples of grounding techniques include:
- The 3-3-3 rule invites you to looking around your current environment and:
- name 3 things you see
- identify 3 sounds you hear
- move or touch 3 things, such as your limbs or external objects
There are many variations of this method as well such as the
- The 54321 activity
- Observing the room around you, list 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can feel, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste
2. Box breathing: another popular grounding method is called box breathing
- breathe in for 4 counts, pause for 4 counts, exhale for 4 counts, pause for 4 counts, then repeat!
Image of mist diffuser or humidifier by Felicia Buitenwerf on Unsplash
Above is a video of a koi pond with fish swimming in it. What do you see as colors? What do you hear as sounds?
Are You "Doom Scrolling?"
Doom scrolling became a more common term during 2020, when everyone was stuck at home and spending a lot of time on social media. If you find you are doom scrolling too much, take a break.
Or if you feel like you are comparing yourself too much to others, follow hashtags like #selfcare on Instagram.
Accounts to follow to brighten up your Insta feed:
@selfcareisforeveryone
@anxiety_wellbeing
Occupational therapist Stefan L Barbas shared on social media, three ways to unwind from technology when our brains are overwhelmed:
- The Single Task Hour: Choose one daily hour to do ONE thing only. Put your phone away. Embrace the initial discomfort. Allow your brain to relax and focus on the one task
- The 10 Minute Reset: Stop working every 2 hours and look at nature or close your eyes; take 5 deep breaths; notice how your body feels
- The Evening WInd-Down: put your screens away 1 hour before bed; write down your to-do list for the next day; do some light physical movement like stretching; do a mindful activity like art, reading, or listening to music or an audiobook
5,203 Things to Do Instead of Looking at Your Phone by ISBN: 9781523511754Publication Date: 2020-09-29Because life is calling. Put down your phone, close the lid on your laptop, and get back in touch with the wonders of the world around you. With thousands of ideas for simple, beautiful things to do instead of scrolling down the rabbit hole of cyberspace, this healing little book offers the opportunity, 5,203 times, to slow down, look up, and rediscover what makes you feel nourished and grounded as a human being.
Digital Library Books
Real Self-Care by ISBN: 9780593489734In Real Self-Care, Lakshmin helps readers understand what a real practice of caring for yourself could-and does-look like. Using case studies from her practice, clinical research, and the down-to-earth style that she's become known for, Lakshmin provides a step-by-step program for real and sustainable change and solace.
The More or Less Definitive Guide to Self-Care by ISBN: 9781615196104Publication Date: 2019-11-01Some days you need a pick-me-up, some days you need a life preserver. "For most of us," writes Anna Borges, "self-care is a wide spectrum of decisions and actions that soothe and fortify us against all the shit we deal with." You may already practice some form of self-care, whether it's taking an extra-long shower after a stressful day, splurging on a ~fancy~ dinner, or choosing Netflix over that friend-of-a-friend's birthday party. But when life gets so overwhelming that you want to stay in bed, some more radical care is crucial to maintain your sanity. The More or Less Definitive Guide to Self-Care is here to help you exist in the world. Borges gathers over 200 tips, activities, and stories (from experts and everyday people alike) into an A-to-Z list--from asking for help and burning negative thoughts to the importance of touch and catching some Zzz's. Make any day a little more OK with new skills in your self-care toolkit--and energy to show up for yourself.
Hell Yeah Self-Care! A Trauma Informed Workbook by ISBN: 9781787752467Publication Date: 2021-01-21Take a moment to pause... Breathe... And ask yourself, what does self-care mean to you? Times are very tough-in a world that pushes us to go faster, be the best, and get ahead of others, we often forget to focus on ourselves, leaving us with anxiety, anger, burnout, stress, and trauma. In this creative workbook and journal leading mental health pioneers, Alex Iantaffi and Meg-John Barker, provide you with the tools to begin your self-care journey and develop sustainable self-care routines and rituals that work for you.
You Are Your Best Friend: everyday rituals for self-care by ISBN: 9781452184074Publication Date: 2021-04-06 ChronicleThis book serves as an artful and loving reminder: it's OK to put yourself first. You Are Your Best Friend offers thoughtful tips for navigating the inevitable pressures of your daily grind. Each brief lesson is accompanied by a cheerful illustration in this cozy read. With a little bit of guidance, it's easy to create your own self-care rituals. Author Anisa Makhoul offers an empathetic and straightforward guide to carving out time for you. Her hand-rendered, intimate illustrations invite you to bring more coziness and comfort to your everyday life.
The Her Campus Guide to College Life, Updated and Expanded Edition by ISBN: 1507210337Publication Date: 2019-04-16Every young woman's essential guide to tackling all of the challenges of college--from stress to debt to scholarships--in a completed updated new edition: "Some things are common sense but some things aren't--especially when it comes to navigating a college campus in a way that's fun, independent, and totally safe" (Today.com). Complete with fun checklists and helpful worksheets, this guide shows you how to make the most out of your undergrad experience--in and outside the classroom.
Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself by ISBN: 9780593192092Publication Date: 2021-03-16End the struggle, speak up for what you need, and experience the freedom of being truly yourself. Healthy boundaries. We all know we should have them--in order to achieve work/life balance, cope with toxic people, and enjoy rewarding relationships with partners, friends, and family. But what do "healthy boundaries" really mean--and how can we successfully express our needs, say "no," and be assertive without offending others? Licensed counselor, sought-after relationship expert, and one of the most influential therapists on Instagram Nedra Glover Tawwab demystifies this complex topic for today's world. In a relatable and inclusive tone, Set Boundaries, Find Peace presents simple-yet-powerful ways to establish healthy boundaries in all aspects of life.
Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by ISBN: 0061733520Publication Date: 2015-06-23 Harper CollinsSelf-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Leave Insecurity Behind offers expert advice on how to limit self-criticism and offset its negative effects, enabling you to achieve your highest potential and a more contented, fulfilled life. More and more, psychologists are turning away from an emphasis on self-esteem and moving toward self-compassion in the treatment of their patients--and Dr. Neff's extraordinary book offers exercises and action plans for dealing with every emotionally debilitating struggle, be it parenting, weight loss, or any of the numerous trials of everyday living.
The Power of Fun: How to Feel Alive Again by ISBN: 9780593241417Publication Date: 2021 Random HouseIn this follow-up to her hit book, How to Break Up with Your Phone, Price makes the case that True Fun—which she defines as the magical confluence of playfulness, connection, and flow—will give us the fulfillment we so desperately seek. If you use True Fun as your compass, you will be happier and healthier. You will be more productive, less resentful, and less stressed. You will have more energy. You will find community and a sense of purpose. You will stop languishing and start flourishing. And best of all? You’ll enjoy the process.
Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness To Speak-Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive by ISBN: 9780062991058Publication Date: 2021-06-15Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compassion. Now, ten years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Drawing on a wealth of research, her personal life story and empirically supported practices, Neff demonstrates how women can use fierce and tender self-compassion to succeed in the workplace, engage in caregiving without burning out, be authentic in relationships, and end the silence around sexual harassment and abuse.
Forest Bathing: The Rejuvenating Practice of Shinrin Yoku by ISBN: 9781462921300Publication Date: 2020Forest Bathing explains the traditional Japanese concepts that help readers understand and share in the benefits of the Japanese approach to forest bathing—a cornerstone of healing and health care in Japan. These concepts include:
Yugen: Our living experience of the world around us that is so profound as to be beyond expression
Komorebi: The interplay of leaves and sunlight
Wabi sabi: Rejoicing in imperfection and impermanence
The complete guide to self-care : best practices for a healthier and happier you by ISBN: 9780760367964Publication Date: 2020 Chartwell BooksThe Complete Guide to Self Care features 100 accessible activities that help you reconnect with your body, mind, spirit, and surroundings, and leave you feeling refreshed and ready to face the world again.
Love for Imperfect Things: how to accept yourself in a world striving for perfection by ISBN: 9780143132288Publication Date: 2018-12-24In this follow-up to his international bestseller "The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down," Zen Buddhist monk Haemin Sunim turns his trademark wisdom to the art of self-care, arguing that only by accepting yourself--and the flaws that make you who you are--can you have compassionate and fulfilling relationships with your partner, your family, and your friends. With more than thirty-five full-color illustrations, Love for Imperfect Things will appeal to both your eyes and your heart, and help you learn to love yourself, your life, and everyone in it. When you care for yourself first, the world begins to find you worthy of care.
Emotionfull: a guide to self-care for your mental health and emotions by ISBN: 9781642503579Publication Date: 2020-09-15An easy-to-use guide for how to cope when you're full of difficult emotions and struggling to maintain your mental health. We can get overwhelmed by our own emotions. Though there's nothing wrong with what we're feeling, we all struggle with how best to face stress, anxiety, sadness, and even excitement sometimes. Emotionfull helps us process difficult emotions, one by one, and allows us the space to focus on them in a way that's healthy
Be You, Only Better: Real-Life Self-Care for Young Adults (and Everyone Else) by ISBN: 1608687384Publication Date: 2021-03-16Along with all the perks of becoming an adult come challenges and the need to learn skills that help you self-regulate as you venture into new experiences. Highlighting five key areas of life -- physical, mental, emotional, social, and financial --Be You, Only Better offers science- and experience-backed tools and easy-to-implement techniques for success. Skill-building and self-care practices -- such as journaling, getting enough sleep and exercise, embracing nature, managing time and money, and practicing gratitude, mindfulness, and optimism -- are presented, and each is illustrated with the story of a real young person. These practices will help you create a resilient foundation for your powerful future. You'll discover a wonderfullyaccessible lifeline and a realistically inspiring guide to leading -- and loving -- your best possible life.
Self-Care for College Students by ISBN: 9781507211151Publication Date: 2019-07-30Make the most out of your college experience with these manageable self-care tips that are easy to incorporate into your busy college lifestyle. As a student in college--you're dealing with a lot. At times this can be physically, mentally, and emotionally draining between classes, homework, activities, and building a new social life for yourself. But the secret to making sure these are the best years of your life is making time for self-care. If you've been working for hours on your latest paper, take a walk around campus to get moving. If you're feeling tired after a long week of classes and activities, give yourself permission to say no to those Friday night plans and take a relaxing evening for yourself. Self-Care for College Students offers suggestions that help you tackle every aspect of taking care of yourself from the simplest tasks to rewarding activities that might require more planning. Whether it is making sure you eat a healthy meal to utilizing your school's support services, there is advice for any situation.
The Self-Care Handbook by ISBN: 0857088157Publication Date: 2019-12-16Learn how to improve and maintain your health and wellbeing with a practical and achievable self-care guide Are you looking after yourself? For so for many of us, with so much to do and think about, self care - taking care of our mental, emotional and physical health and wellbeing - often falls by the wayside. The Self-Care Handbook equips you to make positive, helpful choices for incorporating self-care into your life. It explains how to take responsibility for your own wellbeing and provides ideas and practical advice on how you can better look after yourself.
Everyday Self-Care for Educators by ISBN: 1000022900Publication Date: 2019-07-25If you're an educator experiencing burnout, compassion fatigue, or vicarious trauma, this book will help you embrace tangible self-care practices to improve your well-being both in and out of the classroom. Using the framework of the "window of capacity"--the zone of the nervous system arousal in which a person is able to function most effectively--the authors illustrate not only "the why" of self-care, but also "the how." Chapters explore how stress at school impacts personal life, the way teacher self-care benefits students, and ways in which schools can implement and support well-being.
The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook by ISBN: 9781684033348Publication Date: 2019-04-01Now in its seventh edition--with more than one million copies sold worldwide--The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook remains the go-to resource for stress reduction strategies that can be incorporated into even the busiest lives. The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook broke new ground when it was first published in 1980, detailing easy, step-by-step techniques for calming the body and mind in an increasingly overstimulated world.
The Well-Gardened Mind: The Restorative Power of Nature by ISBN: 9781476794464Publication Date: 2020-07-07A distinguished psychiatrist and avid gardener offers an inspiring and consoling work about the healing effects of gardening and its ability to decrease stress and foster mental well-being in our everyday lives.
A Burst of Light and Other Essays by ISBN: 9780486824307Publication Date: 2017-07-24Originally published in 1988 as part of The Cancer Journals, this path-breaking collection of essays is a clarion call to build communities that nurture our spirit. Lorde announces the need for a radical politics of intersectionality while struggling to maintain her own faith as she wages a battle against liver cancer. From reflections on her struggle with the disease to thoughts on lesbian sexuality and African-American identity in a straight white man's world, Lorde's voice remains enduringly relevant in today's political landscape. Those who practice and encourage social justice activism frequently quote her exhortation, "Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare." In addition to the journal entries of "A Burst of Light: Living with Cancer," this edition includes an interview and three essays.
Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times by ISBN: 9780593189481Publication Date: 2020-11-10An intimate, revelatory book exploring the ways we can care for and repair ourselves when life knocks us down. Sometimes you slip through the cracks: unforeseen circumstances like an abrupt illness, the death of a loved one, a break up, or a job loss can derail a life. These periods of dislocation can be lonely and unexpected. A moving personal narrative shot through with lessons from literature, mythology, and the natural world, May's story offers instruction on the transformative power of rest and retreat.
The Body Is Not an Apology by ISBN: 9781626569775Publication Date: 2018-02-13Title recommended by UConn Student Health & Wellness (SHaW). Humans are a varied and divergent bunch with all manner of beliefs, morals, and bodies. Systems of oppression thrive off our inability to make peace with difference and injure the relationship we have with our own bodies. The Body Is Not an Apology offers radical self-love as the balm to heal the wounds inflicted by these violent systems. World-renowned activist and poet Sonya Renee Taylor invites us to reconnect with the radical origins of our minds and bodies and celebrate our collective, enduring strength. As we awaken to our own indoctrinated body shame, we feel inspired to awaken others and to interrupt the systems that perpetuate body shame and oppression against all bodies. When we act from this truth on a global scale, we usher in the transformative opportunity of radical self-love, which is the opportunity for a more just, equitable, and compassionate world--for us all.
Your Body Is Not an Apology Workbook by ISBN: 1523091185Publication Date: 2021-03-16Based on the New York Times bestseller The Body Is Not an Apology, this is an action guide to help readers practice the art of radical self-love both for themselves and to transform our society.
The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion by ISBN: 9781593859756Publication Date: 2009-04-29"Buck up." "Stop feeling sorry for yourself." "Don't ruin everything." When you are anxious, sad, angry, or lonely, do you hear this self-critical voice? What would happen if, instead of fighting difficult emotions, we accepted them? Over his decades of experience as a therapist and mindfulness meditation practitioner, Dr. Christopher Germer has learned a paradoxical lesson: We all want to avoid pain, but letting it in--and responding compassionately to our own imperfections, without judgment or self-blame--are essential steps on the path to healing. This wise and eloquent book illuminates the power of self-compassion and offers creative, scientifically grounded strategies for putting it into action. Free audio downloads of the meditation exercises are available at the author's website: www.chrisgermer.com.
The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Stress Reduction by ISBN: 9781684031283Publication Date: 2018-07-01Stress is a part of life--but it doesn't have to take over your life. With this guide, you'll develop the skills needed to help you manage difficult emotions, cultivate self-compassion, adopt positive physical and emotional habits, build resilience, and connect with your true values. Everyone experiences stress. From the moment we wake up in the morning to the moment we finally settle into bed at night, our days are packed with stressful moments--some big and some small--that can quickly add up and feel overwhelming. Unfortunately, you can't escape stress. But you can change the way you relate to it. This important workbook will show you how. Written by internationally renowned ACT experts, The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Stress Reduction offers a powerful ten-week program for stress management drawing on the latest research in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) and mindfulness.
Breath: the New Science of a Lost Art by ISBN: 0735213631Publication Date: 2020-05-26No matter what you eat, how much you exercise, how skinny or young or wise you are, none of it matters if you're not breathing properly. There is nothing more essential to our health and well-being than breathing: take air in, let it out, repeat twenty-five thousand times a day. Yet, as a species, humans have lost the ability to breathe correctly, with grave consequences. Journalist James Nestor travels the world to figure out what went wrong and how to fix it. The answers aren't found in pulmonology labs, as we might expect, but in the muddy digs of ancient burial sites, secret Soviet facilities, New Jersey choir schools, and the smoggy streets of São Paulo. Nestor tracks down men and women exploring the hidden science behind ancient breathing practices like Pranayama, Sudarshan Kriya, and Tummo and teams up with pulmonary tinkerers to scientifically test long-held beliefs about how we breathe.
Physical Library Books
The Comfort Book by ISBN: 9780143136668Publication Date: 2021-07-06For anyone in search of hope, looking for a path to a more meaningful life, or in need of a little encouragement. This book is Haig's life raft: it's a collection of notes, lists, and stories written over a span of several years that originally served as gentle reminders to Haig's future self that things are not always as dark as they may seem. Haig offers warmth and reassurance, reminding us to slow down and appreciate the beauty and unpredictability of existence.
Take a Break
Or try some yoga and meditation with UConn Rec!
Disclaimer
This content guide is meant to be solely informational in nature. It is not meant to provide professional care or recommendations. It includes general considerations, but readers should contact their medical provider for individualized advice, treatment, and recommendations.
If you are experiencing a mental health emergency, call 911 or go to your local hospital. If you are in crisis, please call 833-308-3040 to be directed to immediate 24/7 help.
